Checked my email last night and completely freaked out as the contents meant that circumstances had changed and that would influence my decision. From 85:15 the scales had tipped to 45:55. And it completely spoilt my mood. Went to bed enacting different option plans, trying to figure out what is it that I really want, wondering whether this is fate and hypothesing whether this may be a blessing in disguise to edge me to take charge and face my demons. My hyper happy mood was obliterated and replaced with the familiar anxiety just by a single email!
Woke up this morning, and suddenly it hit me that I had misinterpreted the contents! Which means that I'm back at square 1 and that I freaked out for nothing. Why is it that I have a tendency to do that, and would out of the blue find answers or solutions upon waking up? Haiya... so now, I'm back to happy, the hyperness is escalating as the hours tick by coz my clan's arriving today!!!! It's not just about homesickness, and being with loved ones, but I also believe they will help me see things as they are clearly and keep me right. Probably should let them rest a bit before I pounce on them, but I bet there's little chance of that and knowing me, they'll expect that too. Afterall, in my whole life, nobody could disrupt my sleep as I would be really grumpy, but if I see them resting or sleeping when I'm wide awake, aha... time to start poking , tickling and pulling hehe...
That's it... no more worries for the timebeing, I'll be occupied and too busy enjoying the company of my folks ;)
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